Sorry

This afternoon I was driving back from Indianapolis and I was hungry. Because I was by myself the question came to me, "Where is somewhere that I can go for lunch that my wife and children typically will not allow me to go?" Immediately I exclaimed, "White Castle!"

I should explain that my wife hates White Castle, she hates the taste, she hates the smell, she hates the long-reaching effects (they are called "belly bombs" and "sliders" for a reason). 

So there I was, at the White Castle drive-thru, ordering a sack of burgers. And, as I placed my order, I knew that I would soon have to apologize to my wife for my actions. But, regardless, I went ahead and ordered a sack. 

Driving down the road it didn't take long before the burgers were gone. In their place was a stomach aching from an act of gluttony, a car reaking from grease, onions, and pickles, eyes filled with regret, a mind flooded with sorrow, and a heart desiring to repent. 

And even though I knew in advance that my wife would not approve of my actions, and that I would need to make amends and apologize to her for the damage I was doing to my body and to her vehicle, I went ahead, ordered and consumed multiple burgers.

 

This afternoon I am paying for my actions! 

I cannot help but reflect on how closely this resembles our spiritual life. 

So often we are tempted by a selfish desire and - even though we know that it will do damage to our body, our mind, our heart, our soul, and those who are closest to us - we move forward. 

We navigate the road, pull into the drive-thru, place our order, and consume as much as we can. All the while we know that we will soon have to appologize and repent of our ways. 

We focus on the temptation that is before us until the temptation becomes sin in our life. 

What we are left with is a body that has sinned, a mind flooded with sorrow, a heart that desires to repent, and a soul that is broken. 

You see, The most troubling aspect about our sin is that we are scarred for the future. 

Even as I sit this afternoon, still feeling the effects of the burgers, still knowing the pain that I have caused my wife (in her vehicle anyhow) I have to admit that I could eat another "slider" right now. 

It is the same way with our sin. What once was a surface level desire - a temptation that otherwise would pass by - has the ability to imbed itself deep into our life. Over time our temptation becomes sin, our sin becomes addiction, and our addiction becomes our identity. 

So, the next time you are tempted by a selfish desire, call out to God. Let him remind you of the far-reaching pain that your sin will cause - to yourself, to those closest to you, and to Him. 

Thanksgiving in the Late 1980s

It was a Wednesday afternoon in November in the late 1980s. My mom had been laboring around the house all day, cooking, cleaning, and preparing. Tomorrow was Thanksgiving and there were several relatives coming to our house to celebrate. 

Everything smelled wonderful; the aroma of pumpkin pie, oyster dressing, and roasted turkey filled the air. Everything looked perfect; not a finger print to be found on a mirror or window, you could see your reflection in the linoleum, and there was not a speck of dust in the air. 

My dad had left three hours before to pick up my Great Aunt, who would be spending the holiday weekend at our home. She was set to arrive at any moment. 

My mom was in the kitchen finishing up the final preparation on the evening meal when I asked for a drink of milk. She answered me, "I'll get you a glass of milk in a minute". But I did not want a drink in a minute, I wanted it right then. So, I walked into the kitchen and headed for the refrigerator. 

As my mom walked past me, she reminded me, "I'll get you a glass of milk in a minute".  Then she headed into the living room. 

I continued toward the refrigerator and opened the door. There it was, a gallon jug of milk, three-quarter full, plenty of milk for a glass. I pulled it off of the top shelf. As the jug came off of the shelf I suddenly became aware of the weight of the milk, particularly the reality that it was heavy - too heavy for me at the moment. 

As the jug of milk fell from my loose grip it was as though everything was moving in slow-motion. The milk fell to the floor with a thud, the cap flew off of the jug and shot across the room, and the milk began to gurgle out. Suddenly everything sped up, now the milk was pouring out at an increased speed.

I watched at the milk flowed freely from the jug, "gulg, gulg, gulg...". With every "gulg" that I heard I could see precious moments my life flashing before my eyes. Soon my mom was going to return to the kitchen and see this spill - the milk was now throughout the kitchen and was flowing like a river behind the refrigerator and into the hallway where it was saturating the carpet. 

"Aunt Alice is here", my mom called out as she turned to come into the kitchen. I'm not sure what happened at the moment. I woke up several months later in the hospital and, to this day, I shiver every time I walk through the dairy section. 

Why did I disobey? Why didn't I simply listen to my mom and wait for her to get me a glass of milk? Was I so thirsty for milk that I couldn't wait another minute? Perhaps. Did I not believe that my mom would get me a glass of milk? Maybe. Or, more likely, I wanted my way and I wanted it now. In short, I was being selfish, thinking of me - my wants and my desires. 

I find this same issue - selfishness - has presented itself in my life time and time again. Even at the age of 35 I find that I want my way and I want it now. 

Selfishness is what drives all wrong - all evil - all sin - in our wold today. And, this has been the issue that mankind has dealt with from the very beginning - in the Garden of Eden.

But the consequences are much worse than a milk-covered floor in need of another mopping . The consequences for our continued selfishness is the consequence pronounced by God in the very beginning, death. 

We must get past our selfish desires - past a our me-mindedness to an eternal Kingdom-mindedness. We must fix our eyes on Jesus - making Him our focus. As Hebrews 12:2 states, Jesus is the author and perfecter of our faith. 

I think about this "spilled milk" incident and the phrase "don't cry over spilled milk" immediately comes to mind. Perhaps we are not to cry over a glass - or a gallon - spilled milk yet we are to cry - and be broken over our selfishness and our sinful desires. This is what Paul wrote in Romans 7:21-24, I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?

Yet, Paul goes on to to give the answer to our brokenness, our selfishness, and our sinful desires, Romans 7:25; Thank God! The answer is Jesus Christ our Lord.